


Phantom Satisfaction

by The_Lonely_Creator



Category: sweet pool
Genre: M/M, Pining, Route ending spoiler, The lightest of gore, sad boy hours
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-25
Updated: 2020-02-25
Packaged: 2021-02-27 19:55:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,153
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22901314
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Lonely_Creator/pseuds/The_Lonely_Creator
Summary: Short and sweet, like a lover's flesh.
Comments: 3
Kudos: 9





	Phantom Satisfaction

**Author's Note:**

> Wrote this in an hour after playing Makoto's ending again. I've also been imbibing adult juice drink. I love my tragic, hungry sunshine boy <3

"Caution, the train doors are now closing. Caution, the train doors are now closing."

As stated by the tinny voice over the intercom the train doors closed with a smooth swoosh, blocking out some of smothering glow of the setting sun as it dipped behind the tall buildings. Makoto softly whistled as the train started moving again. This was normally the stop he would get off at to head home after school but lately his destination had changed. He glanced around the near empty carriage where only a few business men and one other student remained. He hadn't really noticed before but it was obvious not many students lived this far out in the city, which only added to the isolated atmosphere of this district.  
The intercom informed him that they were approaching the next stop so he made his way over to the doors and stepped out into the chilled air. The recent influx of rainstorms had caused the temperature to dip so that even when standing in direct sunlight you could feel the cold gnawing into your bones; this didn't bother Makoto though, he had never been someone who was affected by the cold. Continuing to whistle away he walked down the quiet streets, one hand in his pocket and the other loosely holding his book bag strap. While this wasn't his usual route the rest of his day had been perfectly normal - go to school, greet his friends, get told off for eating in class, go out to eat with friends once school was over - yet it didn't feel out of place or surreal. It felt like a natural part of his routine, heading down these secluded streets towards that white apartment complex. As the building came into view Makoto felt his stomach flutter from excitement... Or was it actually from all those burgers he had just stuffed into his mouth?  
Ah, it would probably be best not to mention the burgers.

Arriving at apartment 303 Makoto placed his hand on the door knob and pushed open the unlocked door. The minute he stepped inside a delicious scent drifted from the room directly in front of him, causing his stomach to growl.  
"I'm hoooome!" He called out cheerfully while shutting the front door and kicking off his shoes and dumping his bag in the vestibule. Following the appetising scent like a bloodhound he entered the main room of the apartment which was furnished rather sparingly with the usual everyday items: a bed, a sofa, a small TV and a compact dining table with only two chairs. The most unique object in the room was a large aquarium in which little glittering tropical fish idly swam around.  
Wait, were they tropical? He couldn't remember. He had made a joke about eating them, which was poorly received.

"Oh, welcome back, Makoto." A quiet voice greeted him from the attached kitchen. A boy his age stood by the cooker stirring a pot and holding a small tasting dish in his other hand.  
"Youji! Mmm, whatcha making there? It smells amazing!" Makoto grinned at him, practically bouncing over to where he was.  
"It's a recipe my sister taught me. I've never tried making something like this before, so I don't know how it'll taste..."  
"Don't worry! I'm sure it'll taste great!" Makoto automatically reassured while reaching down to taste some of the broth off the little dish. He looked up and Youji and winked, to which Youji only raised his eyebrows in reply before going back to focusing on cooking.  
Still standing there Makoto studied him. They're were very different people, not only in appearance but also in personality as well as interests and, well... basically everything. Youji was always so quiet, so reserved, so mysterious, it was hard to tell what he was thinking. It was something that had bothered Makoto for so long; he thought he knew Youji better than anyone - save his older sister, of course - but then there were times he would feel like a complete stranger. But, that never deterred Makoto, not in the slightest.  
Youji meant so much to him.  
So much.  
So, so-  
"-oto? Makoto?"  
"Ah! Y-yeah?"  
"Could you please set the table? The food is ready."  
"Right! Sure thing!"

"Mmm! Oh! This! This ish soh good!"  
Taking large forkfuls Makoto tore into the meal before him, letting out bits of praise between chewing while Youji watched on in slight astonishment. Makoto eyed his plate and noticed that it had substantially smaller portion than his own.  
"Are still not feeling well?" He asked, mouth now empty.  
"Mm, sort of." Youji replied, then seeing Makoto concern quickly added. "But I'm feeling much better than before. I've never had much of an appetite."  
"Man, imagine not having an appetite! I couldn't live like that!"  
"I'm sure you couldn't, considering you still went to get burgers even though you were coming over for dinner."  
"Huh?! How did you know?! Can you smell them or something?!"  
"I... was only joking, but it seems you've admitted to it..."  
"Ahhh! That was so scary! I thought for a second you were psychic! For real!"  
His overreacting got Makoto the prize he wanted for Youji couldn't help but chuckle at him, revealing a soft, tender smile that lifted the solemn look in his dark eyes. Feeling the mood lighten Makoto continued the conversation.  
"Well, just keep eating good food like this and you'll be back at school in no time!"  
"I've missed so much work already."  
"Yeah, Kamiya's been on my ass to get you caught up, he was even considering sending Shironuma round to tutor you."  
At the mention of their classmate's name Youji's expression soured.  
"Let's... Not talk about him."  
Makoto smiled to himself.  
Another victory.

During the clean up after the meal the conversation turned to how each of their days had been with topics varying from school antics to interesting articles on the internet, the tone light and friendly. It warmed Makoto's heart to see Youji talk more openly with him. At school and even when they had briefly hung out beforehand he had always been curt and vague in his replies, letting others do most of the talking. It was like he was keeping everyone at a distance, but here he was, talking to Makoto much more casually. Thanks to his sickly condition making him miss school most days Youji never had the chance to bond with his classmates. Makoto was the only one who made any effort to engage with him, so it wouldn't be much of a stretch to say he was Youji's only friend. He was even able to pick up on when he was feeling ill or just uncomfortable.  
Yeah, he definitely knew him better than anyone else.  
"It's nice to have your company, but wouldn't you rather be having dinner with your parents?" Youji asked, gently sprinkling the fish food into the aquarium water's surface before looking at Makoto over his shoulder.  
"Ah, it doesn't matter! Dad's having to pull later shifts, mum's joined an evening fitness class and our neighbors are walking Merry so I don't really need to go home!" Makoto grinned. "Plus, I much rather be here, spending time with you. Just the two of us."  
He saw Youji's eyes widen slightly and he saw the blush taint his delicate pale skin. The way Youji quickly turned his head away and clumsily set down the fish food gave away the he was feeling embarrassed. It stirred something up in the depths of Makoto's very being, threatening to bring a nauseating sense of desire to the surface. Swallowing hard Makoto advanced from table were he had been sitting and positioned himself so that Youji was blocked in between him, the wall and the aquarium. With their slight height difference Makoto was gazing down at Youji, who had turned his head to face away from the other boy. Gently Makoto lifted his hand and brushed strands of Youji's soft ebony hair behind his ears, causing him him to flinch. Now he could see his profile; his jawline, his trembling pallid lips, his long eyelashes that cast soft shadows onto his unusually heated cheeks. A far cry from his common indifferent appearance it made the fluttering in Makoto's stomach stronger.  
Youji looked so vulnerable and he... Well...  
He felt almost... ravenous.

"Hey, Youji?" He murmured softly, moving in close to Youji's ear but making sure to keep his face in view. "Can I spend the night here? I wanna spend more time with you..."

Even as he spoke a loud pounding in Makoto's head threatened to drown out any other noise. Was it the rapid pounding of his heart? The crimson hue on Youji's face deepened, nearly sending Makoto into a frenzy.  
He could hear how deeply his breathing had become. He must sound like a wild animal. But he couldn't help it. Everything about Youji stirred him up: his face, his voice, his eyes, his scent, his silence, his somber demeanor. The way he always looked like his mind was somewhere far away, the fact that it seemed like if Makoto took his eyes off him for a mere moment he would simply vanish. No one else cared for Youji as deeply as he did, no one stressed over him as much as he did - not even that creepy bastard Shironuma!  
Makoto knew he was Youji's only friend and that's how he wanted to keep it. He wanted Youji to only look at him, to only care about him, to only think about him. He wanted Youji to smile at him and tell him how much he loves him.  
He wanted Youji to be his.

Every. Single. Part. Of. Him.

"So? Can I? Can I stay with you, Youji? Can I? Youji? Youji? Youji? Can we... Stay together?"  
Reaching out and cupping his soft face Makoto turned Youji so he could look at him properly. But instead of looking embarrassed Youji's deep eyes only reflected sadness, any light from them gone leaving only a dull and empty void. His skin was drained of any trace of colour leaving it a haunting shade of grey.  
"It's too late..." He croaked in a hushed voice.  
"What...?"  
Makoto stared back, frozen in place. "Youji, w-what do you mean?"  
"It's too late..." He repeated, deep crimson gashes appearing across his body as he spoke. It sounded as if he was gargling blood.  
"It's too late, Makoto. You've already... destroyed everything."

Makoto woke with a start, his bloodshot eyes snapping open. His chest heaved up and down through labored breaths. Pearls of cold sweat adorned his forehead while an uncomfortable dampness hugged his torso, causing his school shirt to cling to him. Staring up at the dim ceiling he tried to collect himself and figure out where he was when a shooting pain in his left arm pulled him from his hazy thoughts. Dragging his tired eyes down to the source he was met with a gruesome sight. His left forearm was torn open, a violent gash so deep you could see the white of a bone beneath the violated flesh. A blood soaked bandage lay beside it.  
Ah, of course. Now he remembers.  
He's in hell.  
Collapsed on a depressed and stained bed in a nest of squalor and filth. The stench of neglect and decay fills the air, with dust coating everything it can. The grime-coated aquarium sits as silent as a tomb, void of any life. His shoes and book bag lay abandoned in the vestibule. There was no sound in the lifeless apartment.  
Lifting his uninjured arm Makoto covered his eyes, taking in deep breaths that cracked and dissolved into deep, shaking sobs. How many times would he awaken like this? How many times would he try to fool himself?  
It wasn't real.  
It was an illusion. A dream. A fantasy.  
Another one of his sick wishes.  
Youji was right. Makoto had destroyed everything. On that day in chemistry lab he had ruined both of their lives. Giving into his fear, lust and inhuman hunger he had got his wish, and subsequently lost everything. His normal life, his grip on reality, his very humanity and... Youji.  
He had lost Youji.  
Youji was gone.  
All that remained of him was the images in Makoto's head and the long white fragments scattered across the floor. The endless gnawing hunger clawed it's way from the depths of Makoto's stomach, the constant reminder of his sin, along with the stained aftertaste of copper and the lingering sensation of chewing meat.  
Trying to resist the urge to tear away at his own flesh again Makoto tried to seek refuge in his sick, selfish dreams, where he and Youji could spend all their days together, laughing and smiling in the company of each other. Where Youji would stay with him, forever.  
Dreams of a future that could never have been.


End file.
